Tuesday, 23 July 2013

Things that make you go.................................VOM!

So I had a wander down the road and sat on the wall talking to the lovely Lizi that owns the flower shop opposite. When I went to move,  my left leg didn't - it had been stuck to the wall by a lump of huge slavvery bubble gum. I was not impressed. Not one bit. Lizi went and got me some wet wipes and although they took the bulk of the gum off I had to use a sponge scourer to get the rest of it of and it also took the top layer of skin with it. I feel violated.
I am a bit of a vommer when it comes to anything icky. Having a fertile imagination doesn't help. I could clean my own children up no worries when they were babies but I really struggle with a lot of stuff. I have quite a strong constitution and very rarely vom but there are tons of things that just make  me feel sick.
Slugs - I once lived in a very very damp flat and one night when I had come home I had thrown my tights over the back of the chair in my bedroom. In the morning when I picked them up a slug had crawled INTO them. I have despised slugs and tights ever since.
Worms - my brothers once had worms when I was a little girl ( lots of kids did in the 70's, we weren't urchins ) and I lived in fear that I would get them. To me they would be like earth worms growing in my tummy.
Cat poo.
Vomit on a pavement.
Noodles - this stems from the film 'The Lost Boys' when Michael, the good guy, meets Keifer Sutherland, the bad vampire and Keifer offers him a takeaway box of noodles and when Michael looks in they have turned to worms. All noodles look like worms to me now. End of.
Any form of prolapse ( my granny had one and had to have a rubber ring! ) or limb coming out of it's socket.
People that pick their noses and eat it.
PUBLIC TOILETS - this is my worst one. I go in them but if there is so much of a hint of a smell I need to leave quickly and cross my legs.
So as long as I avoid all of the above I generally live a normal life. I am sat typing this on my leather sofa and I can feel my leg is sticking to it. There are bits of gum still on it. I need tweezers to extract the last few bits......................I will be brave.
On a jollier note tonight -- it's the quiz again at Polmanter. Don't Tuesdays come round fast these days? I have dumbed it down a bit from last week's and there are no Bosnian questions.
I hopped on those bleddy scales again and thankfully I have lost what I put on from my hog fest on Saturday and if I lose this week then I will be the proverbial jammy cow!
Not that I would ever eat jam obviously ...............

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