I want my scales back and I am going to be on the radio and I dont care how many people I tell.......

So since my last blog I have given my scales away , had a birthday, and oh yes.............one of my poems is going to be on the radio!

 

I will explain the scales bit first.

 

I have said many a time on here and basically to anyone that will listen that I am a hopper on and off. I get up, I hop on, I hop off, I have a wee, I hop back on, I hop off, I clean my teeth, I hop back on. I have cheeky little hops ons through the day, I hop on at night and if I wake for a wee through the night, I hop on then too. This is doing me no good as the only scales I should really pay any attention to are the official ones at fat club. I gave my scales to a very nice lady called Angela.

 

I want them back.

 I want them back now.

I am weighing tomorrow totally 'blind' and have no indication as to what those bad boys will say in the morning and quite frankly, this is unsettling me.

 

I told Angela when I gave them to her not to let me have them back no matter how much begging and pleading I did and I think tomorrow there will be a LOT of that. I am a mess without them.

 

My birthday was good though. I am now 46, which I think is a bit too close to 50 for my liking but I am not going to stress about it. I got given some lovely gifts and huge amounts of alcohol, which of course after Saturday, I could drink again. My moderation amazed even me! I didn't drink loads and I didn't get drunk. My nose went heavy and I felt very tired but I am sure I behaved myself as much as can be expected. I haven't really had a drink since then and all my numerous bottles are all sat looking at me. It's odd - I know I can have them if I want but I am not sure I actually want them at the moment................

 

And the bestest news from the last few days was from Source FM,  a local ( ish ) radio station that is going to play one of my poems on its' show on Friday evening. I had to tell them a bit about myself and I said something which I thought was quite arty farty like 'yeah I like to observe people and I am lucky to have a lot of diverse people in my life which I take my material from'. I refrained from saying 'luvvy' at the end and the recording I have done is a bit cringey but we all have to start somewhere. The poem they picked was one I wrote a couple of weeks ago and in case any of you haven't read it - here it is..........

 

 

 

A Different Hat

So all the people that you encounter...
Throughout the course of humdrum days
As you rush to work, or dash round shops
With the odd child attached stickily to your hand
Some may intrigue
Some may be bland
But behind the masks of normality
Do you ever
Stop and question
That
Some may wear a different hat?

Those happy souls with smiles attached
To glowing faces
May in fact
Sit quietly when there’s no one there
May only hear their own despair
May stare at walls
Or gaze at screens
Or breathe in violent curdled screams

And those so quiet
And just ignored
We imagine sit there prim and bored
But what if they , yes, really them,
Entertain some gentlemen
Engage in drinking, swinging , drugs,
Or sip cheap dark rum from china mugs
And that grey man upon the train?
By night he may just inflict pain
On someone tied onto his bed
He cracks whips while she gives head
Behind each cranny and every nook
There’s many hats on many hooks
Of normal people just like us
That want to blend, not make a fuss
But never underestimate your observations
Of people’s lives
And complications
Never think all’s as it seems
Never think well that is that
For with us all, within our dreams
We can all sometimes wear a different hat

 

Of course since then I have had complete writers block but by writing today's blog I am easing myself in gently................darling.