There's no quizness like Liz quizness.............

So as the town is busier I am resuming the Tuesday night quiz at the local campsite / bar. I did 2 a few weeks ago - the first one was packed, the second one had 3 blokes and the ladies from book group. We have high hopes for tonight and I have tailored my quiz accordingly. I have written dozens and dozens of quizzes over the years and this is what I have learnt.

 

If you are a female that has written a quiz the first thing any men will say is ''oh bloody hell, I hope it's not all soap operas and films '' ( quizzes are notoriously sexist )

 

No matter how 'easy' you make the quiz, when you see some of the punters you will panic and think that it's too difficult

 

Despite what the men say, telly always goes down a treat

 

As does advertising slogans

 

There will always be at least one drunk heckler

 

There will always be one geek that will come up to you at half time and challenge you on one of the answers

 

If you have a microphone you should curtail your alcohol consumption

 

There will always be at least one team that chatters all the way through and then asks you to repeat several questions

 

If you do a quiz for any rural community none of them watch telly or films or listen to music.

 

It's all good though and I think I have written a decent set of questions. I have had many a scrap at a quiz over the years, partly because I think I am always right and partly because if it's a quiz I have written then I get the hump when people criticise something that I have spent a lot of time and effort creating.

 

The first and best heckle I ever had was from a fella called Keith in a pub. I had composed a question about the twin towers disaster which he yelled was 'sick' . My next question was about the death of Princess Di so that rattled him even more and he was removed rather tactfully from the pub by Hilary the very tolerant landlady.

 

I once also had words with a cheesecloth wearing hairy woman who hadn't wanted to pay her quid for entering but instead wanted to play on her own but then decided to challenge me on whether or not Billy Bob Thornton had played the part of the American president in the film Love Actually. She said he hadn't, I said he had ( he had ) and then told her to be quiet. I was right and she was wrong - end of. Plus she hadn't paid her quid so she had no right to even speak to me.

 

I haven't done any questions tonight about worldwide tragedies or Billy Bob or any sport ones at all and some of the questions are ridiculously easy but I may change my mind when I arrive.

 

Or maybe I will just go with the flow and have a couple of drinks and pick up the microphone and hope for the best.................